I’m unhappy with the way I look. I feel like I have gained so much weight and I feel motivated to start going back to the Gym. I need to do this for myself. I need to get into better shape and become proud of how I look and get stronger. I know I can do this. I want to become a good runner, and addicted to the feeling of working out. I need to do this. I know I can. I reached out to Benson in order to see if he’d like to be my accountability partner. I also know that I need to get into better eating habits. I didn’t buy anything too terrible when I went shopping the other night so I feel like that will be able to happen without too much difficulty. I also feel like I need to do this so that when I do, inevitably, compare myself to other people, I can feel proud of how I look. I want Nash to think that I’m attractive. I want to make myself proud and it’d be a good way to spend time. I know it’ll be difficult, but I know I can do it. I can listen to terrible pop punk music and run and lift and get into shape. I feel motivated to do this. One way I thought about motivating myself is to print photos of me and the exes that broke my heart and putting weight goals on them, and then only allow myself to take them off when I hit that goal. The only problem with that is that It’d probably be a little weird for Nash. But this is something I need to do, and if it helps, I think that she’s understand.
I hope that Benson and I can come up with a good schedule to be able to be consistent with a work out schedule. Wish me luck.